Diary of A Village Traveller: Day3

August 3:

Bloody dogs:First nights almost peaceful sleep (too many mosquitoes!!!) was interrupted by stupid wild dogs who started barking so very loudly. Some had entered the house, which was left open at night. (That's how people in villages sleep.) To top it all, I realised i was sleeping alone and I had no idea where to go, so i just got up and , after so many many years, i was actually calling out for my mother like a small kid in desperate need. I finally went back to sleep in the other room, with my father!

Bilaasi Bahu: The next morning was quite muggy, thanks to the drizzling that went on the whole night. Fortunately the air was only humid and not hot.

Bilaasi bahu (bahu=daughter in-law) is our cook. That's how everone knows her. That's her identity and that has actually become her name. So finding out what really her name was was quite a task. This is what the conversation between Ma and her went like, following the discussion about finding out 'her' name:

Ma: Whats your name.

BB: Why its Bilaasi bahu.

Ma: No but what is your (with emphasis) name.

BB: (laughing) ya THAT is my name.

Ma: No but that is your husbands name.

BB: You can call me Selampur waali.

Ma:But that is where you belong. I dont want your village's name. What is yours.

BB:You can call me Vinay's mother (Vinay ke maai).

Ma: But that's again your son's name.

BB: (highly amused) Them you can call me Mohan's mother (Mohan ke maai).

Ma: OK what was your name before you got married?

BB: OK like that. Rekha. But how does it matter? no one knows it. They all call me Bilaasi bahu, always.

So much for a name! Uff!!!!

The rest of the day was spent in playing football with the kids and feeding the goat (to which some people actually said something like "..feeding her right now, and then you will feed on her in another two months.."!!).

Another comparatively uneventful day, except the Bilaasi bahu incident. What is with having your identity that is completely dependent on someone else (it is not even yours then)!! I think an analogy can be drawn in the urban scenario to adoption of our husbands surnames after getting married. That also doesn't make sense to me!

Goodnight

:)